| UNIVERSAL LAWS
1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease,
your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped,
will roll to the least accessible corner. 3. Law of Probability -The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act 4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never
get a busy signal and someone always answers. 5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for
work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.. 6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes),
the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every
time). 7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water,
the telephone rings. 8. Law of Close Encounters -The probability of meeting someone you
know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen
with. 9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that
a machine won't work, it will. 10. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot
coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee
is cold. 11. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich
landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of
the carpet or rug. 12. Wilson's Law of Commercial
Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you
really like, they will stop making it.
13. Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment
to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. But don't make
an appointment, and you'll stay sick.
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