UNIVERSAL LAWS 1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee. 2.Law of Gravity- Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
3.Law of Probability-The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act
4.Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.
5.Law of the Alibi- If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire..
6.Variation Law- If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).
7.Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
8.Law of Close Encounters-The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
9.Law of the Result- When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
10. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
11.Law of Physical Surfaces- The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
12.Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy-As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it. 13.Doctors' Law- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.